George Herrick

“Your beliefs become your thoughts. Your thoughts become your words. Your words become your actions. Your actions become your habits. Your habits become your values. Your values become your destiny.” – Mahatma Gandhi

Addiction depends on being non-conscious. I don’t mean passed out unconscious, I mean not being aware of, or not making conscious choices.

We think the same things over and over. We do the same things mindlessly. We do what is familiar without a conscious thought to the consequences. But if you want to see the consequences, look at the overall average level of joy, fulfillment, calm and creativity you experience in your life. These are some of the ways to get a clear measure how conscious or unconscious you are.

We are designed to feel supported in life, not burdened by it. But we have to be conscious about what we’re doing to either add to our support or add to our burden. Bad stuff happens, but consciousness allows us to be resilient and find ways to deal with and sometimes even benefit from those bad things.

For example, breaking your back and becoming paralyzed would lead some people to hopeless despair – Christopher Reeve saw it as an opportunity to make a difference. Being born armless and legless could lead some to believe they are worthless – Nick Vujicic used it to become an internationally known inspirational speaker, and Kyle Maynard used it as a challenge to climb Mount Kilimanjaro. Blindness could lead one to think they could never succeed in their dream career – home cook Christine Ha became a chef at a 5-star restaurant without seeing anything she prepared. As Henry Ford said, “Whether you believe you can or you can’t, you’re right.”

These people, and others who overcame seemingly insurmountable odds, became very conscious of both their limitations and theirs strengths, and used the latter to overcome the former.

To have more say in our destiny, we need to be more conscious in all six of the steps Gandhi mentioned that lead to it.

CONSCIOUSNESS EXERCISE

Here’s a simple exercise that will help you be conscious and present in this very moment. Take a morsel of your favorite healthy food and follow these steps, paying close attention to your senses and emotions as described in the exercise. It will probably take about 10-15 minutes, but with practice, you can gain this level of consciousness in seconds.

(NOTE: for this exercise, please avoid extraneous stimuli – phones, computers, TV, books, newspapers, etc. Just focus on the piece of food and the process.)

 SENSES

• Sight: Look at the morsel on the plate. Notice the shape. Outline it with your eyes. Notice the irregularities of its shape. Notice the color of the morsel, and any variations in the color. Notice the shadowing due to the lighting of the room. Notice how the texture appears on the morsel (is it smooth, rough?). Turn the plate so you can see the morsel from different perspectives.

Describe what you see:

• Touch: Now pick up the morsel with your fingers and close your eyes. Notice its weight. Notice the texture as you touch it – does it feel like you imagined it would when you saw it on the plate?

Describe how it feels to the touch:

• Smell: Bring the morsel close to your nose and close your eyes. Breathe in the aroma through your nostrils. Is the aroma pleasant? Can you discern the scents of the different ingredients?

Describe the aroma and as many ingredients as you can identify:

• Taste: Taste the morsel with just the tip of your tongue. Does it have a flavor? Now taste it on the center of your tongue. Has the flavor changed in any way? Finally taste it on the back of your tongue. Again, any change in flavor? (Each part of the tongue tastes different flavors and discerns sweet from savory from seasoned.)

Describe your experience and any differences you noticed:

• Hearing: Take a bite of the morsel and chew it, again with your eyes closed. Notice the sounds you hear, and notice whether you can distinguish what sounds are made by the gnashing of your teeth, the lubricating of your saliva, the pull of your muscles near your ears. Notice the sound when you swallow what you have chewed. Also notice the sounds around you – are there birds or traffic outside? Is someone moving around near you? What do you hear?

Describe the sounds and the experience of listening intently:

• Body: Lots of other things are happening in your body while you eat. How many can you notice? For example, did your stomach begin to “growl” or “churn” as you were looking at the morsel on the plate? At what point did you begin to salivate? What was your breathing like during the exercise – were you breathing throughout (hint: certainly not as you swallowed or you’d have choked!).

Describe the different experiences you noticed during this experience:

EMOTIONS

• Feeling: As you ate the morsel, did you notice any emotional feelings? Were you happy, content, irritable, or other feeling? (Whether you did or did not is equally fine – there is no right or wrong emotional response.) Was the experience pleasant, unpleasant?

Describe your emotional feelings or lack of them:

• Energy: Did you notice any difference in your energy level at any point during the exercise? Is your energy level any different after the exercise than before starting?

Describe any changes you noticed in your energy:

• Effects: Notice whether you had any other awarenesses during this exercise, for example:

Memories: Did the food, or any part of the exercise remind you of something or someone, either past or present?

Thoughts: Did your mind drift? If so, what did you think about?

Triggers: Did any part of the exercise trigger any positive or negative emotional reactions? If so, what was the trigger and what did it trigger? How did it influence your experience? Can you let it go?

Satisfaction: What was your overall level of satisfaction with the exercise, the food and your awareness?

Did the experience lead you to be aware of anything else?

If there are any questions you could not answer, that’s fine. You may be more or less aware of some of your processes, or you may simply have not experienced some of these effects. Try again at another time, and be conscious of that experience.

This exercise can be done in many ways, with many different objects, events, circumstances or people. You won’t always be able to use every sense, but you can become more present and aware of your experiences, surroundings and the impact they have on your body, mind, mood and emotions. Whether in a business meeting, on a date, playing with your kids, or whatever you are doing, practice being as conscious and present to the experience as you can. It is a great way to feel more vibrant and alive in everything you do!

We are seeing a world-wide transition into a new paradigm, and sometimes it feels disquieting and uncomfortable, like shedding our skin. Economics, politics, social culture, the environment – it’s all changing.

Some people are resisting the changes, others are watching them, and some people are influencing them. That last group is where I find myself wanting to come out and play. Those who inspire, create, empower and lead seem to be the ones who have the most lively, constructive energy and who are having the most fun. Although at times I have shrunk from it, that’s what my soul always wants from me.

There are two essential questions that most of these people tend to ask themselves: What am I called to do for this new paradigm? And what am I called to stop doing?

In my work (and my life), the answers to those questions lead me to a very challenging vision: I dream of a shift from an addicted, destructive culture to a courageous, compassionate, creative culture.

I’ve made the choice to commit to working with people who have their own version of that dream. That’s where I will be putting all my energy this year.

In order to realize that dream, we have to stop deadening our senses or avoiding our passions and really come alive to what has meaning for us. I love the popular quote from Howard Thurman, “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

So I ask you:
Are you willing to know who and what you truly are?
Are you willing to do whatever it takes to be all you can be?
Are you willing to let go of what is not working for you?
Are you willing to love and accept yourself in a very deep and meaningful way?
Are you willing to use your talents and gifts to serve others?

These are the kinds of questions we tackle in the Living the Soul of Recovery process, and they are the kinds of questions that the founders of many of the recovery programs – Bill Wilson (Alcoholics Anonymous), Albert Ellis (Rational Recovery), Hale Dwoskin (The Sedona Method), and others – asked themselves.

If you are one of the people who are truly seeking to shift from an addicted, destructive culture to a courageous, compassionate, creative culture, now is your time! The new paradigm is calling you to come alive and fulfill your dream of a meaningful, purposeful recovery, “Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

To learn more about Living the Soul of Recovery, go to http./www.georgeherrick.com

A Personal New Year’s Letter to My Readers

No lessons or steps for this issue, just a commitment. I invite you into my heart this time.

The holiday season is over, and we have begun a new year. My holidays were a little different than usual – Throughout the month of December, I participated in one of the most intensive trainings in my life, “The Inspired Leader’s Rites of Passage” (created and masterfully led by the visionary founder of The Inspired Leaders Academy, Lizabeth Phelps, inspiredleadersacademy.com ). Think bootcamp, like “The Biggest Loser” for the soul!

The full impact of this experience will, no doubt, unfold over time. But the immediate effect is how it impacts my work with those who put their trust in me as their coach.

We live in challenging, sometimes chaotic, often frustrating times. Everyone is impacted by the addiction-like, brain-numbing destructiveness we see in the media, in politics, in the financial realm and other aspects of our society. It can be hard to maintain focus on our own dreams and goals when we are inundated with “other peoples’ agenda.”

But that’s exactly what many of us are called to do: focus on our own mission and use it to serve others. The world needs people who are willing to be bold on behalf of a greater vision, a vision of loving kindness, empowered action, creativity and contribution.

Not everyone agrees with this, and some who agree are not on that path. As long as they are on a journey that is constructive and caring, we can only wish them well.

But for those of us who want to make a more peaceful, prosperous, meaningful world community – either locally or globally – the opportunity is here, now, to do what we are capable of. And we are capable of so much! I see it in so many of you whom I’ve met, and I know it to be true of so many others.

For my part, the work is called “Living the Soul of Recovery.” It is geared toward people with long-term recovery from addictions or self-defeating habits who are feeling ready for “something more” or “something deeper” as their recovery remains solid but their lives feel stagnant, stressed or overwhelmed.

Yet at any given moment, as many as half of my clients don’t identify themselves as “in recovery” – will I abandon them? Of course not! We are all in “discovery” and “recovery,” discovering our purpose and meaning, and recovering our passion and power to shape our lives and futures. I welcome everyone who believes, as I do, that it’s time to really “show up” and make a difference: first in our own lives, so we have the resources we need, and then in the lives of others who need our talents, skills and passions.

In the weeks and months ahead, my mission is to make this LifeLetter, Facebook posts, videos, and every other venue available a system of support for your mission. You will find practical, doable actions you can take that will help you commit to accomplishing your dream and benefit others in the process. You will find links to other resources, and opportunities to join in community with kindred spirits. I hope you will take full advantage of it, and share what you find here with everyone you feel can benefit from it.

For those who are ready to really dig in, I have made more time available to work with you. You have your mission (or you are seeking to discover it), but you ARE my mission – so take advantage of the moment and contact me now.

This is your time, and I look forward to serving you in every way I can.

“Round the table, may peace and joy prevail. May all who share this season’s delight enjoy countless more.”– Chinese Blessing

 The holidays – Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Solstice, Christmas, New Year’s, Kwanzaa, etc. – are meant to be times of celebration and meaning. Yet they often trigger stress because of the expectations, assumptions, pressure and judgment we attach to them.

It doesn’t have to be that way, yet for so many, that stress is so familiar and habitual that to try to eliminate it just adds more stress. So is it enough to just reduce the stress, and manage whatever level of stress we may feel? Absolutely! Studies have shown that reducing stress from a 9 (on a scale of 10 being highest) to even a 7 or so can be significant in improving your health and mental well-being.

How can we reduce our stress, even a tick or two? Here are some helpful tips:

REDUCING AND MANAGING STRESS:

1. Remember the meaning of the holiday and be grateful for what you have;
2. Don’t over-promise or over-extend yourself;
3. Set a budget and stick to it;
4. Celebrate the good things in life;
5. Don’t make the holidays competitive;
6. Allow enough time – for travel, for cooking, etc.
7. Ask for help when you need it;
8. Give help when you can (but remember #2)
9. Get enough exercise and “you” time;
10. Communicate issues or problems before they become resentments;
11. Lighten up – play, laugh, tell fond stories and jokes (but never at someone else’s expense);
12. Let go of expectations and assumptions – the best present is to BE present, with love, joy, compassion and forgiveness.

DEALING WITH ANXIETY:

1. Breathe! Take a few slow, deep breaths, and focus on the inflow and outflow of your breath;
2. Avoid newscasts, or  people and situations that trigger you,  as much as you can;
3. Distract yourself with something relaxing when you are triggered;
4. Challenge your thinking: stick to facts and not suppositions;
5. Try to notice repetitive or obsessive thoughts and do something different (“move a muscle, change a thought”);
6. Make a gratitude list, no matter how simple or basic, and focus on what you are grateful for;
7. Get exercise by walking, working out, stretching, etc.;
8. “Observe your thoughts, don’t believe them.” (Eckhart Tolle) Watch your anxious thoughts as if they belong to someone else.

TO BUILD RESILIENCE:

1. Think optimistically, not negatively.
2. Be flexible and willing to compromise;
3. Stick to your values, but let go of your having to be “right” about everything;
4. Get support from others who are not bothered by whatever is bothering you;
5. Get exercise and drink enough water;
6. Deal with your fears as they arise, rather than letting them accumulate;
7. Trust that you can bounce back from the situation;
8. Learn whatever you can from the situation (then it’s useful!)

IF YOU’RE IN RECOVERY:

1. Go to extra meetings or use your particular support network;
2. Avoid parties where the core event is drinking/drugging/eating;
3. Go to parties late and leave early, and have your own transportation;
4. Avoid stressful, pressure-filled situations;
5. Don’t engage in other people’s dramas;
6. Don’t let resentments build – resolve disagreements quickly;
7. Watch what you eat and drink so you don’t ingest something that’s spiked;
8. Remember, it’s easier to maintain recovery than attain recovery, so protect yours!

Enjoy your holidays, your family and friends. Stay safe. Remember the holiday’s meaning. And I wish you all the blessings of the season – with ease and serenity!